Dream Team
I believe after 7 wonderful years it is time to recognize the elite athletes in our.....sport. To separate the eaters from the talkers, the playas from the haters, the cream from the crop, and those that can "Walk the Line" from those that "Crash" (no Brokeback jokes here). We will create the all-time 1st team all-American Corndog Hit Squad. I put this blog out for nominations for the 5 greatest NCD ballers- achievement, spirit, and longevity will be the primary criteria. Since we don't all know eachother in corndog nation there will definitely be some lobbying and I, like Congress, accept trips, vacations, etc. to get your guy/gal on the team. Henry, Greg, and I (all worthy in spirit and longevity but lacking in achievement) will serve as the judges- unless they throw me under the bus, declare themselves the greatest, and enter the ring with the rest. By the way- there also needs to be nominations for the biggest crash and burn team- this could be triple doubles gone bad or all talk no performance, whatever. This will be the "Burnt Tots Squad." So here are my first 5 in no order and subject to argument:
1- Bob Ishikawa: Finished the '05 TD only when the game went to double OT. Amazing.
2- Tristan Cross: Had to run to the store for tots to finish the TD in time. Dedication.
3- Mike Stair: Back to back TD even after serious stomach issues and pain the first time. Perserverance.
4- Rynnie (Ryan and Bonnie) Flynn: Top hus-wife duo from the get-go. Teamwork.
5- Bubba: Brought a 12' Blow up lobster to a party and then lobbied for guests wearing a sandwich board downtown.* Unbelievable.
*This activity, though hilarious, may or may not bring in the clientele you are hoping for at your party. NCD is not responsible is what we are getting at...good story though.
Burnt tot squad (BTS):
1- Bob Turney: said he would dominate and eat 10-15 dogs but left sweating profusely and sick after 7. Crash.
2- E-Balls: (wants his name protected): After 3 nights of strategy sessions on how to complete the TD he was down on the floor passed out at noon. Vomit. Ouch.
3- Pat "Big Cat" Maloney: Declared his intention of blowing through the TD but like a horse with early speed went out too early on the dogs. Got through 9 and 1/3 before declaring he couldn't take one more bite. Funny.
4- PK: Doesn't drink so asked if he could do 16 dogs and 100 tots with no beer. This hasn't happened yet, but I know how it will end. He will make this team.
5- Random Guy at NCD Portland 2002: Showed up thanks to Bubba's sign and started going to town on the dogs. I think he was in the ally throwing up 30 minutes later, never to be seen again.
So there it is- my early nominations. I expect there will be shuffling of this list so bring on the nominees. Maybe someday we will have an award show like the Oscars or the Espys- I wonder what our statue would look like?
Peace- Brady
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dreamteam
I would like to nominate by adorable nephew Owen to the futures team. He made his first NCD appearance at only 5 days old in 2005, and I have seen the kid eat- trust me, he has many TD's in his future. Plus, he is the first legacy and therefore is due to inherit the corndog kingdom someday. Just a thought...
I have to say that not only
I have to say that not only did I bring a 12-foot lobster that welcomes all to corn dog day but I also helped to promote this honorable holiday by walking around in the middle of NW 22nd and Irving in Portland. What better thing than to eat corn dogs drink beer and spout the benefits of this joyous occasion and the wonderful spirits that it brings. I have missed the last three years of NCD but the self-promotion of NCD has persevered in my absence. I am glad to be back but sorry to inform that the 12-foot blow up lobster will not be inflated and flapping around, he is living a solitary life in a 5X10-storage unit. That said I have to nominate me and pay a special thank you to Brady for putting an * by my name. It is nice to know that I have * by name in NCD infamy. Eat lots Drink lots and have a kick ass time. Happy Freaking Corn Day Everyone!
Bubba
Devin thanks for the vote man.
PS: Thanks for the vote Devin.
Ryan freaking Big Dog Flynn
The man shares his name, or most of it, with Corn Dog. That is to say nothing of his dedication to the cause. He is the Poo.
Mara x 3
We've often had a handicap for the womenfolk... basically whatever they eat gets multiplied by 1.5. using those numbers, Mara's accomplishment is amazing! and she's tiny! the black widow should watch her back!
Dream Team Additions
Henry Otley - The transcontinental returns are legendary. Even more impressive than having them foot the bill was taking his friends out for a $400 bar tab the night before NCD. Some people just step up to the plate. Much love to Henry for these performances.
Anna Gray - She had been dating Matty for about six weeks when the day descended on her. While neither a corndog, tater tot, or beer fan per se, she graciously volunteered to oversee the Monmouth NCD experience. Anna notched the first confirmed NCD injury with a noticeable burn early in the event from a oven mitt issue. Undeterred, she continued to take care of us in fine fashion.
Ann Gray - Also new to the corndog experience, but not to her brother's antics, Ann got her first NCD off to a rocky start. Two jackasses woke her up around 8:30 tapping the Pabst. Not a happy woman, devoid of coffee, she was on the brink of disaster. By 11:00 she was back to her happy sarcastic self.
honorable mention
Has to go to Jesse Schade in 2002. He ate a dozen corndogs drank 6 beers and ate 30 tots before leaving for Portland at 1:00. He came back the next morning and ate 8 more dogs. That was a memorable performance. Matt and I were experiencing intestinal revolt.
Nominee for Manager
Nominee for Dreamteam Manager
I'd like to nominate Chris for the position of dreamteam manager. He is really sharp, very patient and level headed, and he knows what it takes to get his corndogs into the game. Additionally he is a strong corndog griller, beer drinker, and all around good guy.
I'll second Henry's nomination, and add that he is a corndog eating machine, over and above being a jet-set and devoted NCD attendee, and founder.
I'll second Bubba's nomination. He's a condog consuming conqueror. He could also be responsible for onsite team-party promotion. Brady points out his formidable and proven record above. I know that I would have been lost in the neighborhood after 5 beers if that lobster hadn't been over the carport.
Devin
Hall of Fame
So is there a veteran's wing? I know I'm like a boxer -- I announce my retirement every year, then come back and pound 20 corn dogs the next year -- but really, I intend to make it stick this time. After the 2-dog-a-minute pace from two years back, when I wandered off in a corndog haze, ended up in a taxi, made it back to my place, took a three hour nap, then woke up and went and got sushi, I decided that, unlike the Rocket, my time to hang it up had come. At least until I smell the honey-breaded goodness again. I took down at least 10, Brady -- that was no sally out.
In addition to the vets wing, we need the Morningstar Veggie Corndog wing as well. I witnessed the first (and to my knowledge, only) Veggie TD at the Flynn Towers as well.
I don't want to blow my own horn, but I've got some proud corndog memories that I'll take to my (potentially early) grave.
More Burnt Tots
I like where this is going- some fantastic performances of epic proportion. However, I know for a fact that there are more tales of woe than what we have listed here. Every party has someone that goes down in flames after yapping about how easy it would be. That is the true beauty of the TD- it is legitimately difficult to do and newcomers always learn the hard way!!!! keep the stories coming- they are excellent. I love that we have two unknowns (a stranger and barfly) who have made the list. Classic.
Burnt Tots
Reluctantly I will nominate myself for my Corndog day 2000 performance. It fell, like this year, the day after St. Patrick's Day which is not an excuse, but it helps explain my flame out. I was convinced by my fellow doggers that hair-of-the-dog was the remedy to the previous night's excesses, but it only took a sip of the MacTarnahans to send me to the porcelain prayer position. I left the party early without producing a single stat.
Let this be a cautionary tale to all the left coasters, 10 am comes damn early.
a historical feat
I feel the need to nominate Luke Graham AKA Fast Eddie. Luke pounded the dogs, tots and beers to become the first ever recorded TD in WI at last years Milwaukee party. He was also able to put down double digit Whiskey & Coke's after the party at a bar in downtown brew city. This was a great day for all of Wisconsin and he is a great nomination for this all time team.
Worth Mentioning
NCD Arlington 2003:
Daryl Austin - 10 dogs, 100 tots, 10 beers, 10 twinkies, and a Slurpee.
The man known only as "Gary" or "Summer's Gary": 20 beers, 17 dogs....passed out.
Not to blow my own horn but...
I was just thinking that although I am judging and can not vote for myself I will make an unsolicited pitch for my spot on the team for everyone else to debate. I not only once but twice made unplanned trips back home to a Portland corndog day while living and working in Europe. Once from Germany and the other time from Ireland. I was unofficially home for NCD and "officially" home for some sort of work related trip. Both trips were fly in fly back. Certainly that is deserving of at least some sort of honorable mention. Corndog nation can debate my merits.
HankO, Down-under dogfather
Maybe not an All-American...
but certainly one of the most impressive performances off the bench was Robert Nobles in 2003. He showed up after dark having completed a bicycle race that morning. In 45 minutes he ate 10 corndogs and several units of tater-tots. Alas, the clock ran out on this Cinderella Story, as I believe it does on most first-timers, for there is nothing fairy-tale about corndog day endings.
Mara in North Carolina?
I heard a rumor about "Mara" at the North Carolina party last year coming within 6 tots of a Triple Double -- she had already powered through the 10 beers, 10 dogs, and the first 94 tots. As far as I know, that is the best performance to date for the Lady Corndoggers. As such, I nominate North Carolina Mara to the Dream Team.
Mara
I second the vote for Mara. I'd also like to add Lonny, who downed 10 dogs in less than an hour b/c he had to leave for an appointment--Lonny's a personal trainer and had to help a client undo the work that years of corndogs and beer had done.